Why Resolutions Don't Work and What to Do Instead
by Veronica JoceEvery year, as the calendar turns to January 1st, we’re filled with a sense of hope. Resolutions are our way of saying: “This year will be different. This year, I’ll do better. I’ll be better.” They’re a promise to ourselves—a commitment to change, to rewrite our stories.
But let’s be honest for a moment. How many times have you made a resolution only to abandon it weeks later? How many unfinished journals sit on your shelf, haunting you with blank pages? How often do you set the same goals year after year, wondering why nothing changes?
The truth is, resolutions rarely serve us the way we want them to. Instead of inspiring progress, they often leave us feeling guilty, overwhelmed, and stuck. And the problem isn’t the desire to grow—it’s how we approach it.
Resolutions focus on results. They’re rigid, binary, and leave little room for the imperfect reality of progress. This year, try something different. Instead of chasing outcomes, focus on intentions. Instead of waiting for a fresh start, begin where you are. Now.
Why resolutions don’t work
Resolutions fail not because you’re lazy or lack willpower, but because of how they’re designed.
1. Resolutions are all-or-nothing
Resolutions operate on a pass/fail mindset: “I’ll work out five days a week” or “I’ll stop procrastinating.” If you miss a day or stumble once, it feels like failure. This perfectionism kills momentum and leaves you feeling worse than before you started.
2. They focus on what’s missing
Most resolutions are born from dissatisfaction. They focus on what you don’t have or what you want to “fix” about yourself. “I need to lose weight.” “I need to earn more money.” This constant chasing creates a sense of not being enough—right now, as you are.
3. They’re vague and unsustainable
“Get healthy.” “Be more productive.” Resolutions like these sound great on paper, but they lack clarity. Without a clear path, they quickly become overwhelming.
4. They prioritize external outcomes over internal growth
Resolutions often focus on visible achievements—fitness, promotions, productivity—things the outside world can measure. But what about inner growth? Emotional resilience? Self-trust? The parts of you that truly matter and often get overlooked?
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A new perspective: intentions
Resolutions are driven by outcomes. They’re about achieving something specific: losing weight, finishing that big project. But here’s the problem—when you tie your success to a single result, you create a fragile system. Miss a workout, and suddenly, you feel like you’ve failed. Hit a roadblock, and your motivation crumbles. Resolutions leave little room for the realities of life: setbacks, imperfection, and the simple fact that growth is rarely linear.
Intentions are different. Instead of focusing on what you want to do, intentions focus on who you want to become.
At first, the word “intention” might feel vague. But think of it this way:
- Resolutions focus on the what. Example: “I’ll get a promotion.”
- Intentions focus on the who and how. Example: “I’ll approach my work with curiosity, dedication, and purpose.”
Intentions shift the focus from external milestones to the internal mindset that drives real, lasting change. Intentions become a guiding principle for how you want to live your life. It’s not tied to a specific outcome. Instead, it’s rooted in values—what matters most to you.
- Resolutions say: “I’ll be happy when I hit this goal.”
- Intentions say: “I’ll focus on finding happiness in this moment.”
Intentions ask you to look inward: Who do you want to become? How do you want to feel? What daily actions align with your values? When you start with these questions, you naturally move toward the outcomes you desire—but without the pressure of achieving them perfectly.
Why intentions work
Intentions work because they tap into what psychologists call identity-based habits. Instead of focusing on what you want to achieve, you focus on becoming the kind of person who naturally aligns with your goal.
For example,
This is powerful because humans are wired to act in alignment with their identity. When your actions match who you want to be, change becomes natural, not forced.
How to shift from New Year’s resolutions to intentions
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1. Stop waiting for the perfect moment
There’s no magic in January 1st, Mondays, or when life gets calmer. There’s magic in the present moment. Change doesn’t need a calendar start date—it needs you to start, messy and imperfect as you are. What’s one small step you can take today? Not tomorrow, not next week. Today. Write it down and do it.
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2. Focus on the process, not the outcome
Resolutions demand big results: “I’ll write a book.” Intentions break the process into small, achievable habits that you can return to every day: “I’ll write for 15 minutes every morning.” Small, consistent actions create momentum and lasting change. Progress becomes inevitable when you commit to the process. Identify one habit you can commit to daily. Instead of “I’ll get fit,” try: “I’ll move my body for 30-60 minutes in a way that feels good.”
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3. Honor what you already have
Resolutions often focus on what’s missing. But growth doesn’t always mean adding more. Sometimes it means deepening what’s already here.Pause and ask yourself: What’s working in my life? What brings me joy? Instead of chasing what’s next, nurture what you have: relationships, routines, hobbies.
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4. Align with what truly matters
Resolutions often reflect external pressure—what we think we should want. Intentions align with your values. Ask Yourself: What do I truly care about? What kind of person do I want to be? How do I want to feel? Let these answers guide your intentions.
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This year, shift the narrative. Let go of the pressure to fix, prove, or perfect. Instead of chasing the next “to-do,” show up for yourself—today, as you are. Because the truth is, you don’t need a new year, a new plan, or a perfect moment to begin.
You just need you. And the courage to take one small, intentional step.